Harry Potter and the goblet of being a pushover sissypants

Spoiler alert:  I am going to tell you how Harry Potter DIES in this movie.

Just kidding, beloved Harry does not die, but I wish he would.  In fact I would like all of the characters except Hermione to expire in some cruel and painful fashion.  I would save Hermione because she is smart and I have a big poster of her on my office wall (I am just kidding, it is really Hillary Clinton).  The rest of them are blithering idiots.  Here is the problem:

Harry is Mr. Super Wizard and can hold his own against the Dark Lord of Super Evil, but he can't evade the dumbest enemies, doesn't seem to be able to fight back in most instances, and doesn't kill some bad mothers when he has the opportunity to do it.  He is a total p**** f*** sh****^. 

In fact, all the good guys in this movie are inept suckers.  They expect things will just work themselves out if they stay true and good and pay their taxes.  Their leaders will figure things out because their leaders are smart and brave and honest, right?  Like here in Ameriduh.

Here is my alternate ending to the Harry SissyPants and Deathly Hallows Part I:

Crazy Bellatrix is chewing on Hermione's arm.  Hermione slips a dagger from her pouch and stabs Bellatrix in the eyeball.  Bellatrix starts screaming.  Then Dobby teleports in, sees the evil Bellatrix , and then teleports into her stomach.  He claws his way out and yells "Here's Dobby!" with just his head extending from her belly.  He has a mad smile on his face.  Bellatrix expires.  Dobby finds the wand of power and the deathstone and takes on Valdemort and everyone else.  Dobby wins by raining down super bad assed-ness and says cute things like "Dobby just stomped your jewels" and "Dobby just appropriated your spine."  Ron and Hermione commence baby making.  Harry helps.  Music fades. Scene cuts to a car crossing train tracks.  Harry is inside.  Train smashes into car.  Valdemort is at the helm.  World goes black.  The end.

I came home and watching "The Expendables," but that was worse. 

Now you can go read this synopsis to ruin the next movie for you. Or just read the book.   Whatever.

2010 Turkey Trot

I ran the Inside Out Turkey Trot 8k for the 3rd time today.  Last year I kicked the heck out of a bunch of little kids in the 1 miler, but decided to let some other jerk have that honor this year. ;-)

The run went well, I have been very consistent with the runs and it is paying off.  Mile 1 - 6:07, Mile 2 - 6:20, Mile 3 - 6:38, Mile 4 - 6:24, Mile 5 - 6:35.  Total time 32:05 or so.  Miles 1 3 and 5 are pretty hilly.

I jogged to and from the race with the super-hyped up Tassie.  She rocked the show and made lots of new friends.

We're going to spend the rest of the day cleaning the house (or napping) then head over to a friend's for a nice T day meal.

A couple funny Thanksgiving related things people have pointed me to:

ThanksKilling Movie: Gobble, gobble, mother%#$*er!


Have a good one.

random news

I went to Atlantic City over the weekend to spend time with my father and brother-in-law.  Both enjoy gambling - bro in law likes roulette while my Dad likes poker.  He played in a $120 tournament on Saturday and finishes 6th, while I played at a 1-2 no limit table and lost under $100 over the weekend.  Just not hitting the cards on the flop this time. Bro in law went up and down a lot but finished down by a bit.  None of us lost big and never will as we don't have issues with that.

Had a great dinner at Angelo's on Saturday night.  Very neat place with great food and a lot of charm.

I also managed to get a 11 mile run on the boardwalk on Saturday and a 6 mile run on Sunday, and went fishing with some old friends of mine on Sunday morning.   I like the Jersey Shore and have a good time there.  They don't have the same sort of park/tree coverage we have here in North Carolina but it can be a nice place if you know where to go.

This week we are staying around town.  I'm running an 8k on Thursday morning and then we'll cook, eat, and watch football the rest of the weekend. 

Dismissed.

Triathlon/economy survey results

1. Has the Great Recession affected your family income?
	answered question		13
	skipped question		0
		Response Percent	Response Count
Yes, I/we are unemployed/underemployed		15.4%	2
We are on foodstamps		0.0%	0
No, our industry is rocking		7.7%	1
About the same as before		61.5%	8
Things have improved in our line of work - income is up		15.4%	2

2. Regarding triathlon/endurance sports & the economy:
	answered question		12
	skipped question		1
		Response Percent	Response Count
I am racing and training (spending) the same amount as pre-2008		50.0%	6
I am new to the sport so spend more than in 2008		8.3%	1
I am racing & spending less than 2008		25.0%	3
I am racing & spending more than 2008		16.7%	2

3. My house is:
	answered question		12
	skipped question		1
		Response Percent	Response Count
Sold back to the bank (foreclosed) and we are out on the street		0.0%	0
Underwater with negative equity		8.3%	1
We own this palace, baby!		16.7%	2
We are about even on it		75.0%	9
We are barely making the mortgage payment and baby-mama is hungry		0.0%	0

4. I think President Obama is:
	answered question		13
	skipped question		0
		Response Percent	Response Count
A great President		0.0%	0
Doing the best he can		23.1%	3
A socialist shill		38.5%	5
Clueless		23.1%	3
Hamstrung by an economy & society that is beyond repair		15.4%	2
Beholden to the banks		0.0%	0

5. In 2011 I expect the economy will:
	answered question		13
	skipped question		0
		Response Percent	Response Count
Get better with less unemployment & higher income		30.8%	4
Get shellacked by higher commodity prices and dollar devaluation		38.5%	5
China will unload their bonds, driving up US interest rates		15.4%	2
I can't balance my checkbook, what do I care about the macroeconomic environment, dude.		7.7%	1
		7.7%	1

6. My preferred triathlon distance & location is:
	answered question		12
	skipped question		1
		Response Percent	Response Count
Local sprints		50.0%	6
Local Olympic distance		25.0%	3
Local Half or Full		16.7%	2
Exotic location Half or Full		8.3%	1
Exotic location Olympic or sprint		0.0%	0

7. In 2011 my total triathlon/racing budget (gear, race entries, coaching, travel, etc) is:
	answered question		12
	skipped question		1
		Response Percent	Response Count
Less than $1,000		50.0%	6
Between $1,000 and $4,000		41.7%	5
Between $4,000 and $10,000		0.0%	0
Over $10,000		8.3%	1

8. Any other relevant comments on triathlon and the economy? The top 3 serious and well-thought answers will be placed on my blog. I may also post the dumbest/funniest. 
The most complete and succinct answer: milk does a body good.

Economic triathlon survey

Bored?  Take my survey on the economy and triathlon.

Beach 2 Battleship weekend

Bri and I went down to Wilmington to catch the B2B race on Saturday morning.  We had a few athletes racing in the half and one of our regular masters swimmers in the full.  Dinner the night before with a few of our gang, then early to bed to be well rested for a full day of cheering and jeering on the course. 

We were smart and brought our beach chairs this time to set up along the Riverwalk area.  Cancel that - they were still in the car from another trip so we made use of them.  Either way, it was as fun as a day of watching people torture themselves in a long distance triathlon. Our crew had 2 PRs, 2 first-timers, and 1 struggled in the cold but finished.

I am signed up for the Inside Out Sports Turkey Trot 8k on Thanksgiving.  May not do any races in December but will find something in January.

In other news, there is no other news, which is good news.

Aging up

Yesterday I celebrated my 39th birthday, and 11th with my best friend Bri by my side.  We were joined by a few of our masters swimmers and friends at a local tavern for a rollicking good time.  I swam hard at practice, drank a few heavy beers, and am suitably achy today. 

So for 2011 I am now considered a Master competitor in USA Triathlon events.   This is either inspiring or frightful, depending on how you want to view things.  I am very thankful to have made it this far, and I hope to celebrate many more with the love of my life.

This weekend we are going down to Wilmington to cheer on our athletes and friends who are racing the Beach 2 Battleship half Iron or full Iron distance events.  Good times.

In other news, I am painstakingly making my way through ledger entries in the OSB Quickbooks accounting software.  I have about 500 entries to make on expenses, and our little business makes enough to generate an Uncle Sam fee.  So we track everything.  It is a pain in the butt but when tax time comes around it is good to have sh*t organized.

In other, other news, I decided I will train to run a 3:20 or so marathon at the Tobacco Road marathon in late March.  This will give me an early season goal without having to spend too much time on the bike in the cold weather.  I would still like to get my 5k time back into the 18s, I have not been there in a few years now.  The 3:20 goal is achievable without being too competitive, meaning I can train for it without overly risking injury.

In other, other, other news, commodity prices and stocks are going up while unemployment rises.  The asset based economy and the 'real' economy we live in are becoming more disconnected than ever before (in the modern US, anyway).  CYA.

Nosce te ipsum (know thyself)

I wrote this article for our most recent newsletter:

There are a variety of reasons people enter into the athletic arena, and these reasons can change over time.  When you were young, you enjoyed playing with your friends because it was fun and better than doing homework. As you grew into your teens, you started to appreciate the competitive aspect of your sport.  And as time continues onward into adulthood, you realized that there are many health benefits to maintaining an active lifestyle.

Or perhaps you were not particularly active as a youngster, and only now are realizing the thrill that comes along with competition.

Or maybe you just like having goals.

Whatever your reason, this is the time of year to reflect not just on what race you're planning to do next year, but why you are doing it. 

Over the past ten years, I have worked with a couple hundred people either on an ongoing basis or for various one-time lessons.  I have seen middle aged athletes with a indomitable fire for winning, and younger athletes who participate solely for the camaraderie they experience.  There are three central dynamics that drive folks, particularly endurance athletes:

Competition:

This is self evident, since all endurance sports culminate with endurance races.  However, some folks are more competitive than others.  The desire to excel and do well in relation to other athletes is one way to approach competition.  The desire to make personal improvements and set season or lifetime PRs is another way to approach competition.  One is external and one is internal.  They are both fine motivators. 

You probably know at least one athlete who is not happy unless they win, and even then is not happy because something wasn't executed perfectly.  This would be a 100% competitive person.  They can be fun to train with but steer clear on race day.   They are not your buddy on race day.

You probably know someone else who is somewhat indifferent to how they do in relation to the field, but are very hard on themselves if they did not meet their personal goals.  This is an internally motivated competitor.  They compete with themselves rather than others. 

You know someone else who does not really care how well they do in comparison to themselves or to others.  This is a non-competitive person motivated by a different dynamic.

During your lifetime you may be any of these.  It depends where you are in your athletic life and what your reason for training is.

Camaraderie / Fun / Experience:

Another athlete just enjoys movement, sunshine, friendship, travel, and shared experience.  They don't care about winning, or setting PRs, or how fast you are.  They are in it to hang out with their spouse/loved one/friends, to see cool new places and to ride their bike over that mountain.  They may not push themselves very hard, but they are more than happy to go on a ride or run with you.  Or they may push themselves hard because if feels good to go fast.  Winning is not the main motivator - the experience of going fast is. 

In general, these are the athletes who can maintain a sunny disposition rain or shine.  PR?  Great!  Bad race?  No problem. 

Health / Fitness:

If you haven't read the paper lately, 60% or so of the United States adult population is obese.  Obesity causes a variety of health problems as well as makes moving around more difficult.  One of the easiest ways to correct this for most people is to get out and move around. 

Some athletes tend to start endurance sports primarily out of health concerns.  Some may become more competitive while others continue on due to the friendships they create. 

Some never really enjoy the sports but stick with it because they know it is good for them.  Hopefully they learn to have some fun with their friends.

Aerobic exercise and strength training combine to help you become more fit and look and feel better. This is a great motivator for many people. 

Summary:
If you are not clear on why you are training and racing, take a quick assessment of your reasons for doing what you do.  There is no right or wrong answer - there is just an answer for you.  If you were in it for health but now want to move on to being more competitive, great.  If you used to be competitive but now stick with it for health and friendship, way to go.  If you train & race primarily to be able to eat pizza without feeling too guilty, I hear you.

Know thyself and let your actions reflect who you are, what you do, and why you do it.

Marty Gaal, CSCS, is a USA Triathlon coach.